We have all come across incidents of publicly expressed bitterness from professionals after retirement. Sehwag and his openly vocal insistence for some national award, the way Aamir Khan questioned the credibility of film awards when the National Film Awards committee chose not to honor him for ‘Dangal’, and Kathak dancer Sitara Devi declining the Padma Bhushan in 2002, believing that her contributions merited the higher Padma Vibhushan are a few instances that I recollect. The list of disgruntled people is endless and includes hundreds of bureaucrats, corporate high-fliers, writers, actors, artists, singers, and even those who retired from schools and colleges or served in the armed forces of our country, to cite a few.
Social media platforms and WhatsApp allow a lot of these angry-for-apparently-no-reason people to express their dissatisfaction. A large number of such people go way beyond dropping innocuous hints and go about whipping the system. One lecturer tweeted ‘good riddance’ after she retired. I know a few of my course-mates from the Indian Military Academy and after having had a fairly successful career, go on unceasingly about how civilians forget the sacrifices of soldiers in less then a fortnight after the headlines have moved on to other issues of life. My conclusion is that it is not simply a dissatisfaction with the system but they have willingly decided to spear everything and everyone… their parent organisation, friends who disagree, family, professional colleagues, the economy, politics, and, as I have already said, all that they can see, read, or hear.
Why must you fill your time with so much anger – I once asked.
Can’t you see? Can’t you feel the way the world is going? If not, you too are a part of the problem – they chorus.
Conversations with such people leads me to believe that it is not just a craving for accolades but also an unidentifiable emotional upheaval reflecting unfulfilled expectations. There are never reasons why validation is continuously sought because glory has invariably resulted after every victory in every life. The size of the warmth of glory can be big or small. People need to remember that the world loves to applaud but not all the time for the same thing. This pain of being overlooked is surely fictional as recognition is never denied, though it may be late in coming. The form of recognition may not always match one’s assessment but even a few hundred people applauding should be enough to let one’s inner commotion to be pacified. Heroes must never plead.
I believe that each of us is a hero in one way or the other. One does not have to wear a uniform and go vanquishing enemy forces on the border to be one. One does not necessarily have to rise in the gaggle of hierarchy, lead an excited group of award-winners, or be the cheerleader of one or the other notion that rules attention spans for some time. The truth is that no one is ever undervalued, before as well as after retirement. It is wonderful to feel proud of what you have done in life but once you are out of the active professional system, find something worthwhile to do. One needs to leave behind the wish to flaunt their successes all the time. Surinder Jodhka, Professor of Sociology at Jawaharlal Nehru University, while talking about the use of professional stickers on vehicles, writes: The educated class, especially in professions like law and media, want to flaunt their status in the hierarchy. It needs to be translated into social status.’ Blatant displays of professional affiliations can be observed on car stickers owned and driven by those who are no longer actively involved with them.
If you think this disease of being looped between pride and desperation affects only the retired, you are way off the mark. Look around and you’ll discover ‘Police’, ‘Press’, ‘District Magistrate’, ‘MLA’, ‘Gram Pradhan’, ‘Pradhan’ stickers on personal cars. People openly admit that they do this to get access to places where may not otherwise be allowed or get away with even breaking the law. They do this to circumvent the law or sometimes to extend their privileges to their families. We do not stop at loving being addressed as ‘madam ji’, ‘sir ji’, ‘doctor sahib’, ‘colonel sahib’, ‘general sir’, ‘guru ji’, but I know people who employ others to tie their shoelace! The sahib tag still intoxicates. Brats, one might say, but brats who never learn the calming influence of humility. And we have them all over the country… even after retirement. All these wonderful people have crossed over from valid pride of having done their job well to now being desperate seekers of validation.
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Arvind Passey
Written on 10 March 2025
