Don’t be a mug

The mug on my table has enough lessons for our political bigwigs, shabby wigs, no wig, starry wigs, goon wigs, scam wigs, and chic wigs. It has a beautiful curvy nose covering a major part of its face and it is as proud of its nose as we humans are of ours.

You know the funny thing about a mug is that a mug is just a mug and has its face and generally a nose that we hold to lift it… and this is probably why we call this contraption a mug. But look at us. We have a mug and follow it up with a whole range of organs and limbs which must have been entirely our choice when we were choosing our form. But the important thing is the mug. The mug has a mug. We have a mug. The mug has a nose on its mug. We have a nose on our mug.

Now let me tell you where the difference between these mugs is. Does the mug that is a mug ever say: I’m fragile. I need to be handled carefully. I need VIP treatment.’ Does the traffic police ever bring the entire traffic to a halt when a mug that is a mug, is passing by? No. But look at the mugs we have in our parliament. They feel they cannot be driven with the other traffic zipping and zooming on all sides. They feel threatened. Ah! So what they do is ask for Z-security. And all that a mug that is a mug gets is a call from the owner when the bartan-wali mai is doing the dishes: ‘Todna nahin. Mehanga hai.’

The truth is that all of us are mugs… but the mugs in our parliament are different mugs. They get the traffic blocked when they drive out, they have flights delayed regularly, they fill their spaces with wealth and pretend they are as light-weight as all the other mugs, and they are ready to wear a different tagline if a heavier sponsorship is offered. Our parliamentarian mugs also think they are way above the other mugs and don’t generally interact with the other mango mugs.

These UHD or Ultra Hi-def mugs are heard saying things like: ‘We are here to legislate and it is our birth right.’ Or ‘Why must the RTI cover us? Doesn’t the law trust their legislators?’ Or ‘Criminal record is a part of our being. This shouldn’t be used against us. It is, in fact, a feature that makes us powerful inside the parliament.’ Or ‘You masses must learn to mind your own business. We know what is to be given to you and when.’ These mugs zip around in their expensive SUVs and love waving at the ordinary mugs. The mugs that I am talking about generally wear white but they can wear saffron or green or other colours too. They think it is fashionable to break regulations because then the TV channels will invite them in their studios for a debate where they have a shouting match with the hack mugs of the nation. These hack mugs love to shout hoarse all day but then this post isn’t dedicated to them… so let me focus on the parliamentarian mugs.

The only time the parliamentarian mugs reach out to mango mugs is during the election time… and even during this time they try to create a scene. They call each other names and keep declaring that only their father is entitled to be called a martyr mug. Well, the mango mugs love being mugged by these mugs which is quite a sad thing really. The latest news report tells me that one rather unintelligent and morose looking mug said again and again to people who were lined up to vote: ‘Dekh lena bhaiya!’

I don’t know what that bhaiya mug thought of this or finally did… all I know is that mugs will be mugs!

Arvind Passey
08 May 2014

Also sent for publication in ‘The Education Post’. The jpeg of the published article will be put here in a couple of days…

2014_05_12_The Education Post_Don’t be a mug