The great Indian festival

I was once asked to describe a festival. I thought for a while, and then replied, ‘Shopping!’

‘What? Shopping?’ said this friend and raised a questioning brow.

‘Festivals are all about joy,’ I said, ‘they are as much about sharing as they are about buying. There is a lot of happiness being given and accepted. There is this unfettered feeling to redo everything around you with at least a few new things. Right?’

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‘Yes, this is correct,’ he said slowly as what I had just said softly landed on his thought processes.

I said, ‘So when I buy new things I obviously buy them not just for personal use but for the entire family. I buy things for friends, people who work for me, relatives, and sometimes even for sundry strangers. The lights of Diwali, the colours of holi, the fasting and dancing of navratras, and all those visits to temples, churches, mosques and synagogues only add to this joy.’

I waited for a while and then added, ‘Shopping doesn’t just add colour and lights to one’s mood but is the very essence of festivity. Imagine your son do an impromptu salsa when you gift him the Amazon dot. Imagine the bounce in the way the maid walks when you hand her the bed-sheet she had been dreaming about. Imagine the silent smile in the eyes of you parents when you bring home that much needed kindle that helps them read more books.’

‘Sounds interesting,’ he replied.

‘Well,’ I added, ‘shopping becomes a bigger joy when all you need to do is sit comfortably on the sofa and browse the net to reach the Amazon portal and get unheard of discounts and schemes. You can double your happiness quotient if you just hand over a couple of new pens to the courier person who delivers your packages!’

‘Amazon? Now why Amazon?’

‘Simple,’ I said, ‘why go out and get stuck in unruly traffic for hours when you can take all the time to go through hundreds of products sitting at home? Why exhaust yourself haggling when you can get discounts sitting at home without bargaining for them? Why spend money going out and eating more junk food when you can actually be cycling on the exerciser and making buying-decisions at the same time? Why complicate life by going out and hopping from one store to another when you can just navigate from one category of products to another? Why do things that may end up harming the sensitive eco balance when you can relax at home, tend to your plants and discuss the next purchase with your spouse?’ These are not just wild and whirling words of no consequence but are vital to make our surroundings conducive to healthy living.’

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By the way, I have just been to a fascinating place called the Amazon Festive Home that was set-up by Amazon (who else?) where they had displayed an entire range of things that one could buy this season. There were little placards placed everywhere from the bedroom to the kid’s room to the study to the kitchen… and some of these facts astounded me. Here is a list of these factoids that I took care to note:

With over 1000 products and 100+ brands, the Amazon Festive Home was put together in 21 days and 16 hours.
Over 953 packages were delivered to Amazon Festive Home within just 13 days.
The Amazon Festive Home stocks products varying from Rs 10 to Rs 1,00,000!
The shortest time taken for product delivery at the Amazon Festive Home was 62 minutes.
The Amazon Festive Home stocks handloom and handicraft products, some of which date back to over 1000 years!
The Amazon festive Home has 7 Tanjore paintings personally put up on Amazon by the artist!
Approximately 1,491 cups of teas and 501 soft drinks were consumed while bringing together the Amazon festive Home!
Alexa can help you operate lights, TV, AC and other electrical appliances at home using just your voice, without touching even a single button.
The shortest time taken for product delivery at the Amazon Festive Home was 62 minutes!
There is a robot for kids in the Amazon festive Home! Did you spot him?
Alexa can also read you a book.
There is a mattress in the Amazon festive Home that comes in a box!

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These factoids give a fair idea of the sort of range that is available on Amazon and the way artists and creative people are encouraged. Obviously then, to #CelebrateWithAamazon sounds not just beguiling but also sensible. I have read in the papers that the sale is now ON… so I guess it is time to hop on the sofa, switch on the laptop, and start learning hands-on as to what a festival really means.

As an after-thought let me tell you that I have just bought the GoPro Hero7 that came with a free shorty, a pair of casual shoes from Clarks, and a Derwent water-brush set, some water-colours… and Specky, my wife is getting ready with her own list.

Hey, the door-bell just rang… I’m sure it is the courier guy with one of these things that I had ordered. Let me first get hold of something for him to – after all, the joy of festivity isn’t as joyful unless you share some of it. Right?